Bananas Republic

From now on...

In Woody Allen’s wonderful 1971 comedy Bananas, in order to impress his girlfriend back in NYC, failed product tester Fielding Melish participates in a banana republic revolution turned berserk — not unlike the one going on in this country right now. Stay till the end of the clip, then check out the From now ons… below. (And be sure to add your own From now ons… in the comments!)

The following is best read with a faux Spanish accent…

From now on…

• All mothers…will be referred to as birthing people.

• All male athletes…are female athletes.

• All racism…is now anti-racism.

• All government spending…reduces inflation.

• All government workers…must receive experimental drugs, and carry an easily forged card so we can check.

• All covid lockdown, vaccine and mask mandates…are still for your own good.

• All easily refuted fake science…must be followed.

• All Black Republicans…are white supremacists.

• All over-educated white women…must watch The View.

• Ukraine, formerly the most corrupt nation in central Europe…is a democracy.

• All arms shipments to Ukraine…will remain in Ukraine.

• Hunter Biden…is the smartest man we know.

• El Presidente Joe Biden…knows nothing about Hunter Biden’s foreign influence peddling business.

• All citizens…must forget the image of El Presidente Joe Biden falling upstairs.

  • …or struggling to put on his coat.

  • …or falling off a bicycle that is no longer moving.

  • …or shaking the hands of his imaginary friends.

  • …or being utterly ignored when Barak Obama is in the same room.

  • …or (you get the picture; just forget it).

From now on…

• Primera Dama Dr. Jill Biden…is an actual doctor with honorary medical degrees in geriatric medicine and podiatry.

• All Bernie Sanders voters…must vote for El Presidente Joe Biden.

• All Trump voters…must vote for El Presidente Joe Biden.

• Former Primera Dama Hillary Clinton and former El Presidente Bill Clinton…are no longer corrupt kleptocrats.

• Former El Presidente Bill Clinton and billionaire Bill Gates…are two Bills who did not know Jeffrey Epstein.

• All citizens…will care what former El Presidente Barak Obama and former Primera Dama Michelle Obama say about everything.

• America…is still a superpower.

• All citizens…must admit that the Democratic Party cares about working people, people of color and women.

• The global elite…care about you.

• The Great Reset…is great.

• The Green New Deal…is what we get when we combine the Blue New Deal and the Yellow New Deal.

• AOC…is a traumatized victim of January 6th and decidedly not a narcissist. No way.

• January 6th…was an armed insurrection.

• The Big Lie…is a big lie.

• Everyday…will be January 6th.

• The FBI raid of Mar-a-Lago…had nothing to do with January 6th.

Again, please feel free to post your own From now ons… in the comments below, and thanks for spending time with me…